Monday, May 23, 2011

I'm Still Waiting

As we have now survived The Rapture, at least the last predicted one, I find myself feeling sorry for those people that actually believed it was coming. They believed so sincerely, so completely that they would be called into heaven that they sold all their worldly goods, quit their jobs, and moved to California. (Why is it always California? Why not Iowa, why not Jersey?) They wanted to go to heaven so bad that they were looking forward to the end of the world, hoping for it, especially praying for it.

I have one question for them.

What made them so sure they would be selected? Isn't it pride that makes you feel you are better than anyone else? And isn't pride a sin? So doesn't believing that you are saved automatically disqualify you?

I know better. I don't want to be better than everyone, just everyone else that submitted to the same anthology or the same publisher I did. Is that excessive pride? Not really, maybe just enough to make a little profit.
(Maybe this would be a good time to read, if you haven't yet, my silly little short story "One Night In Green Bay or Were-Cow? There Cow." now an ebook at Smashwords.

As to foretelling the end of the world? What are the signs a person looks for? The oracles of ancient Rome looked at the entrails of a sheep or goat. Today that's frowned upon in many municipalities. Insects? The cicadas are active once again in the south, but that happens like clockwork every 13 years. Floods, tornadoes, hurricanes? Those could be the result of altering weather patterns due to global warming, if you believe in science. So how does one tell when this life will end and the next begins? Is there an app for that?

I know now it will happen at any minute. I just looked up and found I have 666 emails in my inbox. Excuse my while I go kiss my wife, call my children and tell them I love them, take Rio, our dog, for one last walk...

I have mail!!
667 emails!!!

The world is good again. Thanks you, Dominique Montera, and your life saving, no world saving offer for "the ability to make her cry out in pleasure." Maybe knowing that the end of the world is still out there, hopefully a long way in the distant future, maybe this will have the same effect.

668 emails! I feel safer with every byte.

No comments:

Post a Comment